Faith at Home

Notice the order in Deuteronomy 6. First the declaration — "Yahweh is our God. Yahweh is one" — the God who brought Israel out of the house of bondage (Deut 6:12). Only then the instruction. What gets handed on is not a rulebook; it is a story of rescue. And who does God entrust it to? Not the priests, not a school — the parents. When the children ask why, the answer Moses gives is a story: "We were Pharaoh's slaves in Egypt. Yahweh brought us out of Egypt with a mighty hand" (Deut 6:21). Israel wrote the words on their doorposts and touched them going in and out. Today's version might be thirty seconds before a meal, ten minutes in the car on the school run, one sentence of prayer at bedtime. Faith is not handed on by one momentous conversation. It is handed on by a thousand unremarkable days.

This household passage in Ephesians is usually quoted with its head cut off. Put the head back: standing in front of every role verse is 5:21 — "subjecting yourselves to one another in the fear of Christ." That is the governing sentence. After it, what each role receives is not authority but a way of laying itself down. The husband's standard is "Christ also loved the assembly and gave himself up for her" — a cross, not a remote control. The wife's submission is "as to the Lord," which means the Lord is the measure of it, not anyone's self-interest. Children honour their parents, and fathers are told not to provoke their children to wrath. A home is not a pyramid of power; it is mutual service in the shape of a cross. And this was not written for model families — the households in Ephesus had their friction and their tears too. Do your own part first, without waiting for the other person to change.

Qingming and the anniversaries of deaths are often the hardest days for a Chinese believer. Two things need separating: remembering the dead, and worship. Honouring your parents, being grateful for those who came before you, not forgetting where you came from — Scripture commands all of it (Eph 6:2-3). Prayer, bowing down, dependence — those belong to the one God alone (Deut 6:4). There is actually a great deal you can do: sweep the grave, clear the weeds, lay flowers, tell the family's stories, put the genealogy in order, give thanks in prayer for the elders who are still living. Not burning incense and not kowtowing is not the same as forgetting your roots. If someone says believing in Jesus makes you an unfilial child, you can answer gently: this faith makes honouring your father and mother the first commandment with a promise attached — and then spend ten years proving the sentence true. Households differ; ask the pastors at your church about the specifics.

If your spouse or your parents have not come to faith, Peter's words are written for you: even those who "don't obey the Word" may be "won by the behavior of their wives without a word" (1 Pet 3:1-2). Don't push, don't go cold, and don't turn the dinner table into an evangelistic meeting — let the change be seen first. Where a mother-in-law lives under the same roof, boundaries and love can coexist: some things are better said by your husband, some things dissolve in a little understanding. Family members are often the slowest to believe, because they watch from the closest range. But God loves them more than you do, and you are not running this marathon alone.