Lesson 65 · Unit 10 · Through the Valley Together
Oil for Your Own Lamp
The only difference between the ten virgins was the oil in their own lamps.
Open
It was your turn to pray alone that evening, and you suddenly noticed that everything coming out of your mouth was names: for her marriage, for his follow-up scan, for the small group's difficulty — all good, all things to ask for. Only, when you were done you sat there stunned: there had not been one sentence in it that was you talking to God.
Bible reading is the same. For a month now you have opened Scripture only to prepare for someone else, and everything you underlined was a sentence for another person.
The lamp is still lit, and it is lighting the way for several people. It is just that you can faintly smell something scorching — the wick is burning down, and the oil is running low.
Scripture
Ten virgins holding lamps, and a Lord who told his disciples to rest awhile. (Matthew 25:1-13, WEB)
1“Then the Kingdom of Heaven will be like ten virgins who took their lamps and went out to meet the bridegroom.
2Five of them were foolish, and five were wise.
3Those who were foolish, when they took their lamps, took no oil with them,
4but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps.
5Now while the bridegroom delayed, they all slumbered and slept.
6But at midnight there was a cry, ‘Behold! The bridegroom is coming! Come out to meet him!’
7Then all those virgins arose, and trimmed their lamps.
8The foolish said to the wise, ‘Give us some of your oil, for our lamps are going out.’
9But the wise answered, saying, ‘What if there isn’t enough for us and you? You go rather to those who sell, and buy for yourselves.’
10While they went away to buy, the bridegroom came, and those who were ready went in with him to the wedding feast, and the door was shut.
11Afterward the other virgins also came, saying, ‘Lord, Lord, open to us.’
12But he answered, ‘Most certainly I tell you, I don’t know you.’
13Watch therefore, for you don’t know the day nor the hour in which the Son of Man is coming.
31He said to them, “Come away into a deserted place, and rest awhile.” For there were many coming and going, and they had no leisure so much as to eat.
See
Oil that cannot be shared out
In this parable the ten virgins are astonishingly alike: all invited, all holding lamps, all waiting for the bridegroom, and all of them even dozing off and falling asleep. There is exactly one difference, and it is hidden where no one can see it — the oil in the vessel. When the cry goes up at midnight, the foolish say, "Give us some of your oil." The wise answer in a way that grates on the ear: "What if there isn't enough for us and you?" (Matt 25:9). That is not selfishness; it is simple fact. There is one thing that cannot be transferred between people — you cannot light your lamp from somebody else's inner room, and you cannot ration out your own spiritual life to the people you are walking with. Here, oil can honestly be read as: your real reserve with God when nobody is watching. Solitude, fasting, gratitude and the examen from Unit 9 are all ways of adding oil to that vessel. And the good news is tucked into a crack in the parable: oil can be bought — the source has never been stingy (Luke 11:13).
The people who serve run dry the most easily
In Mark 6 the disciples have just come back from their first preaching trip and are excitedly reporting results, with such crowds coming and going that "they had no leisure so much as to eat." Jesus' response is not to add more shifts: "Come away into a deserted place, and rest awhile" (Mark 6:31). Notice this dangerous moment — the season when lamps run dry most often is precisely the season when ministry is most fruitful. Volume 3 closed with a line: whoever leads others in reading must keep their own lamp burning, so trim the wick first. This is even truer for people walking others through the valley: every bit of light you give away has to be lit in the inner room first. Solitude in Lesson 51 and rest in Lesson 18 are not spiritual luxuries. They are the lamp's supply line.
Check the oil level
Three gauges, each to be read honestly. One: when was the last time you sat before God simply as yourself — not preparing a lesson, not on someone's behalf? Two: is there still a sentence in your prayers that is you speaking to God, rather than all of it asked for other people? Three: in Sunday worship, are you someone receiving in a seat, or someone on duty the whole time standing up? If all three needles are low, don't beat yourself up — go buy oil. This week, circle a stretch of "inner room with no assignment" on your calendar (fifteen minutes is a start); put rest into the ministry calendar instead of resting on whatever time is left over; and when it is needed, let yourself lay down one piece of service for a season. Someone who comes back with a full tank goes further and shines brighter than someone pushing on with an empty lamp.
Deeper
Oil in the vessel (Matt 25:4)
everyone has a lamp; the difference is in the reserve nobody sees. Public ministry is sustained by hidden communion.
"What if there isn't enough for us and you" (Matt 25:9)
spiritual life cannot be lent; this is not a selfish brush-off but a fact about creatures.
Rest awhile (Mark 6:31)
a deliberate withdrawal is the Lord's invitation, not laziness; even he led his disciples away from the crowd.
Watchfulness (Matt 25:13)
watching is not being strung tight; it is always having oil, for the sake of a bridegroom who is certainly coming.
Story
A. W. Tozer pastored a Christian and Missionary Alliance church on the south side of Chicago for thirty-one years, and invitations to preach came from every direction. But his coworkers all knew his rule: several mornings a week were kept clear, the study door shut, the phone unanswered — and he was usually not rushing a sermon but lying face down on an old rug in worship. He regarded being alone with God as more important than any service, and often reminded young preachers: don't ask first how to preach; ask first how well you know God. His best-known book, The Pursuit of God, was written on an overnight train to Texas — one night, and he barely lifted his pen. A traveling companion later recalled that he seemed to be copying out something already burned into him. The light outside the lamp was that bright because the oil in the vessel had been topped up for decades.
(Historical; see James Snyder's biography of A. W. Tozer and other published accounts. Details condensed.)
Respond
Reflect — alone, or talk it through together
1Matthew 25:1-13: in what ways were the ten virgins the same? What was the one difference?
2"What if there isn't enough for us and you" — why can spiritual life not be lent? Have you ever tried to borrow oil from someone, or to lend yours?
3Of the three oil gauges, which needle is lowest? How will you top up this week?
Saved on this device only — visible to no one but you.
Pray together
Lord, who will not quench a smoldering wick: I bring you this lamp with its faint smell of scorching. Thank you that you do not scold me for a dim lamp, but show me the road to where oil is sold — your presence has never been stingy to anyone who asks. Lead me back out of a ministry that only spends and never receives, into the inner room: let me sit down first, receive first, and let you light me first. May my lamp always have oil, so that I can wait for you and give light to others. Amen.
Walk
This week's actionabout 15 min
Open your calendar and circle a stretch of "inner room with no assignment" for next week first (fifteen minutes is a start), then tell one companion and ask them to ask you a single question when the time comes: did you go?
Mark it when it happens — this week, at your pace.
Spiritual practice
Before every act of service or companionship this week, be still for one minute first and say just one sentence to the Lord: give me oil first, and then lend me your light.
Memory verse · Matthew 25:4
Butthewisetookoilintheirvesselswiththeirlamps.
Walk further
the whole parable of the ten virgins, this volume's Solitude and Silence — where the inner room starts, the theme of sanctification, the life of Tozer, and the Deep Formation reading plan.